Funeral Planning Resources: Every Free Tool and Guide, by Step
The short answer: the most useful free funeral planning resources in the US are the Federal Trade Commission's guide to the Funeral Rule (your rights at any funeral home), the nonprofit Funeral Consumers Alliance (state rules and price help), the Social Security Administration (reporting the death and the $255 death payment), the Department of Veterans Affairs (burial benefits for veterans), and the Green Burial Council (if you want a natural burial). Everything else you need is a set of decisions β who decides, burial or cremation, what kind of service β and this page links to a guide for each, in the order you will meet them.
This page is a map, not a manual. Each step gives the one or two places worth reading and moves on.
The Main Free Resources at a Glance
| Resource | Run by | Use it for | Cost |
|---|---|---|---|
| FTC "Shopping for Funeral Services" (consumer.ftc.gov) | Federal Trade Commission | Your rights under the Funeral Rule: price lists, buying only what you want | Free |
| Funeral Consumers Alliance (funerals.org) | Nonprofit | State-by-state rules, price help, local affiliate groups | Free; local groups may ask for a small membership |
| Social Security (ssa.gov) | Social Security Administration | Reporting the death; the one-time $255 death payment; survivor benefits | Free |
| VA burial benefits (va.gov) | Department of Veterans Affairs | Burial in a national cemetery, headstone or marker, burial allowance | Free for eligible veterans |
| Green Burial Council (greenburialcouncil.org) | Nonprofit | Finding certified green cemeteries and funeral homes | Free |
| National Home Funeral Alliance (homefuneralalliance.org) | Nonprofit | Caring for the body at home, state requirements | Free |
| Your state funeral board | State government | Licence checks and complaints about a funeral home | Free |
Outside the US, start with the government's own page: in the UK, gov.uk's "What to do after someone dies" covers registering the death and help with funeral costs.
Step 1: The First Hours and Days
Before any funeral planning there are a few calls that cannot wait: getting the death pronounced, moving the person into a funeral home's care, and telling close family.
- What to do when someone dies β the full checklist, by day and week.
- Who to notify when someone dies β the list of people, offices and accounts.
- Hospice: the last days β if the death was expected and hospice was involved.
Step 2: Who Makes the Decisions
Before choosing anything, settle who has the legal right to decide. Most states give it first to a person named in writing, then the spouse, then adult children, then parents.
- Who decides funeral arrangements β the usual order, and what to do if it is unclear.
- When siblings disagree about a funeral β when the family does not agree.
Step 3: Choosing a Funeral Home, and Knowing Your Rights
The FTC's Funeral Rule applies to every funeral home in the US. In the FTC's own guide, it gives you the right to:
- get price information over the phone;
- get a written, itemised General Price List when you visit;
- buy only the goods and services you want, not a package;
- use a casket or urn you bought elsewhere, without being charged a fee for doing so.
The FTC also says that, except in certain special cases, embalming is not required by law.
- How to choose a funeral home β what to ask, and how to compare two or three.
- When the funeral home overcharged you β what to do if a bill does not match the price list.
Step 4: What It Will Cost, and Where Help Comes From
The figures quoted everywhere come from the National Funeral Directors Association. Its 2023 survey put the median funeral home charge at $8,300 for a funeral with viewing and burial, and $6,280 for a funeral with viewing and cremation. Those exclude cemetery costs.
- Funeral costs: what to expect β the line-by-line breakdown.
- When you cannot afford a funeral β county programmes, Social Security's $255, body donation and the cheapest dignified options.
- Veteran burial benefits β what the VA pays for and how to claim.
- Life insurance claims after a death β if there is a policy that can pay for the funeral.
Step 5: Burial, Cremation, or Something Else
- Cremation vs. burial β cost, timing and what each leaves you with.
- What happens at a cremation and what to do with ashes.
- Buying a cemetery plot and buying a headstone.
- Green burial, aquamation, burial at sea and home funerals β the less common routes.
- Moving a body to another state and when someone dies abroad.
Step 6: Planning the Service
- How to plan a funeral β the whole service, start to finish.
- Wake, viewing or visitation β which you need, if any.
- Planning a church memorial service and virtual memorial services, for relatives who cannot travel.
- Choosing pallbearers, funeral songs, funeral poems and what to bury them in.
- Faith traditions: Jewish shiva, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Chinese funerals.
- Military funeral honors β how to request them for a veteran.
Step 7: The Words
- How to write an obituary and obituary examples.
- How to write a death notice β the short version for the newspaper.
- How to write a eulogy and what to say at a funeral.
- Funeral thank-you notes β for afterwards.
Step 8: After the Funeral
- The funeral reception β food, place and timing.
- The week after the funeral β when the visitors go home.
- Debts after death, the final tax return and what to do with their belongings.
Where an Online Memorial Fits
Many families set up an online memorial during step 6, because it solves a practical problem: one link with the service time and place, a guest book for people who cannot come, and somewhere to collect photos for the slideshow. It then stays up after the funeral is over. GetMemorial is one option; the best online memorial websites compares it with the others, including free ones.
Quick Answers
Is there a free funeral planning checklist? Yes. The FTC's "Shopping for Funeral Services" guide includes a price checklist, and what to do when someone dies is a step-by-step list for the days before the funeral.
Who can help me compare funeral home prices? Ask each funeral home for its General Price List; the Funeral Rule requires them to give it to you. Some Funeral Consumers Alliance local groups also run price surveys for their area.
Does Social Security pay for funerals? Not directly. It pays a one-time $255 to an eligible surviving spouse or child, and the funeral home usually reports the death to Social Security for you.
Where can I complain about a funeral home? First to the funeral home in writing, then your state funeral board, and the FTC at reportfraud.ftc.gov.
One link for the service details, the guest book and the photos. GetMemorial gives your family one place to keep photos, stories and tributes. Start an online memorial when you are ready.
