How to Write an Obituary: A Step-by-Step Guide with Examples
It doesn't have to be perfect. It just has to be true.
Writing an obituary is one of those tasks nobody prepares for. One day you're grieving, and the next someone asks, "Can you write something for the paper?" or "We need something for the funeral program."
It feels like an impossible assignment: summarize an entire life in a few hundred words. While you're heartbroken.
Here's the truth: there's no perfect obituary. There's only an honest one. And this guide will walk you through it — step by step, with examples you can follow and adapt.
What Is an Obituary?
An obituary is a written notice of someone's death, usually published in a newspaper, online, or shared at a funeral. It serves three purposes:
- Announce the death to the community
- Celebrate the person's life — who they were, what they did, what they loved
- Share practical details — funeral or memorial service information
An obituary is different from a eulogy (which is spoken at a service) and different from a memorial tribute (which is more personal and ongoing). But they can overlap — and that's fine.
What to Include in an Obituary
Here's a checklist of what most obituaries contain. You don't need to include everything — use what feels right.
The Essentials
- Full name (including maiden name or nickname, if relevant)
- Age at the time of death
- Date of death
- Place of death (city and state, not necessarily the specific facility)
- Cause of death (optional — many families choose not to include this)
Life Details
- Date and place of birth
- Parents' names
- Education — schools, degrees, or meaningful learning experiences
- Career highlights — jobs, achievements, or what they were known for professionally
- Military service, if applicable
- Marriage — spouse's name, wedding date (optional)
Personal Character
- Hobbies and passions — what they loved doing
- Personality traits — what made them, them
- Favorite sayings or habits — the small things people remember most
- Community involvement — volunteer work, church, organizations
Family
- Survivors — spouse, children, grandchildren, siblings, and other close family
- Preceded in death by — family members who passed before them
Service Details
- Funeral or memorial service — date, time, location
- Visitation or wake — if applicable
- Burial or cremation details
- In lieu of flowers — charitable donations or other requests
Step-by-Step: How to Write an Obituary
Step 1: Start with the announcement
Open with the person's full name, age, and the basic facts. Keep it straightforward.
Margaret "Maggie" Chen, 78, of Portland, Oregon, passed away peacefully on March 12, 2026, surrounded by her family.
or
James Robert Williams, age 65, died on January 8, 2026, in Austin, Texas, after a courageous battle with cancer.
Tip: Use whatever language feels natural to your family — "passed away," "died," "went home to be with the Lord," "left this world." There's no wrong answer.
Step 2: Share where they came from
Give a brief overview of their origins and early life.
Maggie was born on June 3, 1947, in Taipei, Taiwan, to Wei and Liling Chen. She immigrated to the United States in 1970 and made Portland her home for over 50 years.
Step 3: Describe their life — career, passions, personality
This is the heart of the obituary. Don't just list facts — bring them to life.
Instead of this:
He worked at Ford Motor Company for 30 years.
Try this:
James spent 30 years at Ford Motor Company, where he was known as the guy who could fix anything — and who always had a terrible joke ready while he did it.
Instead of this:
She enjoyed gardening and cooking.
Try this:
Maggie's garden was legendary in the neighborhood. She grew tomatoes the size of softballs and shared them with anyone who walked by. Her kitchen always smelled like something wonderful — and there was always enough for one more plate.
The goal is to make the reader feel like they knew this person, even if they didn't.
Step 4: List the family
This is important to many families. Be inclusive but follow your family's wishes.
Maggie is survived by her husband of 52 years, David Chen; her children, Michael Chen (Sarah) and Lisa Chen-Park (Kevin); her grandchildren, Emma, Noah, and Olivia; and her sister, June Wu of Taipei. She was preceded in death by her parents and her brother, Henry Chen.
Tip: The parenthetical names are spouses. "Preceded in death by" means family members who died before them.
Step 5: Add service details
A celebration of Maggie's life will be held on Saturday, March 18, at 2:00 PM at Grace Community Church, 1200 NE 15th Ave, Portland, OR. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations to the Portland Food Bank in Maggie's memory.
Step 6: End with something meaningful
Close with a sentence that captures their spirit.
Maggie's family takes comfort in knowing that heaven now has a much better garden — and someone who will make sure everyone gets fed.
or
James would want you to know: "Don't cry because it's over. Just buy a Mustang and floor it."
or simply:
She will be deeply missed by all who knew her.
Obituary Examples
Example 1: Short and Simple (~100 words)
Robert "Bob" Miller, 72, of Denver, Colorado, passed away on February 14, 2026.
Bob was born on August 22, 1953, in Chicago, Illinois. He served in the U.S. Army from 1972 to 1976, then spent 35 years as a high school history teacher at East Denver High, where he was beloved by generations of students.
Bob loved fishing, bad puns, and the Chicago Cubs — in that order.
He is survived by his wife, Carol; his children, Mark and Jennifer; and four grandchildren.
A private family service will be held. Donations may be made to the Wounded Warrior Project.
Example 2: Detailed and Personal (~250 words)
Margaret "Maggie" Chen, 78, of Portland, Oregon, passed away peacefully on March 12, 2026, surrounded by her family.
Born on June 3, 1947, in Taipei, Taiwan, Maggie immigrated to the United States in 1970 with $200 in her pocket and a dream of building a better life. She succeeded beyond anything she could have imagined.
Maggie worked as a registered nurse at Providence Portland Medical Center for 28 years, where she was known for her gentle hands and fierce advocacy for her patients. She retired in 2012 but never stopped caring for others.
Her garden was legendary in the neighborhood — tomatoes the size of softballs, roses that bloomed into November, and a standing invitation for anyone to take what they needed. Her kitchen was the same way: always something on the stove, always room for one more.
Maggie loved mahjong (and was ruthlessly competitive at it), PBS documentaries, feeding every stray cat in the neighborhood, and FaceTiming her grandchildren every single Sunday.
She is survived by her husband of 52 years, David Chen; her children, Michael Chen (Sarah) and Lisa Chen-Park (Kevin); her grandchildren, Emma, Noah, and Olivia; her sister, June Wu; and more friends than could fit in any room.
She was preceded in death by her parents, Wei and Liling Chen, and her brother, Henry Chen.
A celebration of life will be held Saturday, March 18, at 2:00 PM at Grace Community Church, Portland. In lieu of flowers, please donate to the Portland Food Bank — Maggie would have liked that.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Writing it like a resume. An obituary is not a LinkedIn profile. Focus on who they were, not just what they did.
Leaving out personality. Dates and facts are important, but the details that make people smile — their favorite chair, their terrible singing, the way they answered the phone — are what people actually remember.
Trying to include everything. You can't fit a whole life in 300 words. Pick the details that capture their essence. The rest can live in a memorial tribute or digital memorial where there's no word limit.
Making it too formal. Write it in a voice that matches the person. If your dad was funny, the obituary can be funny. If your grandmother was dignified and formal, write it that way. Let the obituary sound like them.
Forgetting to proofread. Double-check names, dates, and service details. Ask another family member to review it before publishing.
Where to Publish an Obituary
- Local newspaper — still the traditional choice; most charge by the word or line
- Funeral home website — most funeral homes will post it for free
- Legacy.com — the largest online obituary site
- Social media — Facebook, especially for reaching a wide audience quickly
- A digital memorial — for a richer, ongoing tribute with photos, videos, and family contributions (see our guide: "How to Create a Digital Memorial for Your Loved One")
Frequently Asked Questions
How long should an obituary be? Most newspaper obituaries are 100–300 words. Online obituaries can be any length. Write what feels right — you can always create a shorter version for print and a longer version for online.
Who usually writes the obituary? There's no rule. It's often a close family member — a spouse, adult child, or sibling. Sometimes a friend writes it. Some funeral homes offer writing assistance for an additional fee.
Should I include the cause of death? This is entirely your family's choice. There is no obligation to include it. Some families share it openly, others simply say "after a long illness" or "unexpectedly," and others say nothing at all.
Can I write an obituary for someone who died years ago? Yes. There's no deadline on honoring someone's memory. You can publish it online anytime.
How much does it cost to publish an obituary? Newspaper obituaries typically cost $100–$500+, depending on length and the publication. Online platforms like Legacy.com charge $10–$100. Posting on social media or a digital memorial is usually free.
One Last Thing
If you're reading this, you're probably going through one of the hardest times of your life. And you're still showing up — trying to find the right words for someone you love.
That matters. And the fact that you care this much about getting it right? That's the best tribute of all.
Don't overthink it. Write from the heart. The people who loved them will fill in the rest.